You know that awkward, wet feeling you got all those years ago? The one you felt right after you woke up late Saturday morning? Your parents told you it was just a normal part of growing up but now a couple of years have passed and it hasn't happened in a while? Not if we do our jobs right.
The Broken Escalator is a publication run by Stuyvesant students. It is renowned for its factual integrity and informational reliability. It's only released to students at Stuyvesant High School and citizens of The Democratic People's Republic of Korea. Read it ALL.
SU Paul Lee and Keiji Drysdale: 297 Casey Griffin and Oren Bukspan: 201
Wes Schierenbeck and Chester Dubov: 153
Junior Omika Jikaria and Emily Quint Hoover: 74 Samira Siddique and Harris Dupre: 62
Mohammed Hossain and Ha Gyun Chung: 59
Kathy Lin and Ashish Bhandari: 47
Tobi Idowu and Gally Battat: 46
Konrad Wojnar and Riho Tsuji: 44
Senior Mohammed Rahman and Steven Arroyo: 98 Sara Hassan and Dylan Cohen: 74
Valeriya Tsitron and Lorraine Thomas: 62
Arun Abraham-Singh and Yi-Feng Zhao: 60
Garreth O'Brien and Tousif Ahsan: 37
Richard Lam and Esteban Pomboza: 24
What you hoped would happen on Crushlists: Senior 1: Hey. Senior 2: Hey. Senior 1: So I noticed I was on your Crushlist. Senior 2: Hehe, yeah. Senior 1: Cool. Senior 1 and Senior 2 begin ferociously making out.
What actually happened on Crushlists: Senior 1: Hey Senior 2: Ew. Senior 2 walks away disgusted. Senior 1 pees himself.
Crushlists today were a phenomenal success. It was interesting to see the secret, racist suspicion I had in middle school finally be validated: after 4 years, almost every white boy developed a case of Yellow Fever (way to go, Christine Chung).
In case you missed it, all the action can now be seen online, including rankings and statistics. Just click the "Crushlists" link at the top of the page. If something’s wrong with your Crushlist, please let us know.
Welcome to version ONE of Kernect4, the Stuycom version of 4x4x4 Tic-Tac-Toe!
Currently, you and your opponent need to be at the same computer to play, but that will be improved soon.
Move mouse to rotate cube. Click to place a piece. Press SPACE to freeze rotation. Press R to reset.
Your feedback is welcome.
For some crazy reason I just decided to take a look at this website and noticed that boy, there sure are a lot of posts! Scroll down and read all of them - there's some important stuff as well as some not so important stuff.
Most of what Jonah and Zak say is completely useless and will, in fact, make you stupider. So...watch out.
LOOK TO YOUR RIGHT. There's a new Either/Or up and it's waiting for YOUR vote. I'll probably make an "old results" page eventually...
But, just so you know, the Puppy Love one ended with the Puppy jusssst pulling ahead of Matt, winning 179-72.
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What about having two separate lists for people you have a crush on and people you want to crush (props to Mr. Zamansky)? Imagine how many more dumb boxing matches there would be in the park after school if that happened...
If you click the Crushlists button it'll work now. Go check it out. For now its only last year's lists and the statistics only include people who are registered on Stuycom.
This was already sent to the facebook group but read it again anyway:
When we take down the crushlists and type them up, there are two possible options:
Freshman, Sophomore, Junior, Senior, I'd Hit That, Honorable Mention
General, I'd Hit That, Honorable Mention
That means (depending on whether or you split it by grade or not on your actual crushlist) we will either use the grade format, or the general format. EITHER/OR, not both.
The difference between I'd Hit That and Honorable Mention is that the former is used in the "most crushed on" stat while the latter is not. So people you actually like will go in I'd Hit That, everyone else (i.e. Jonah) will go in Honorable Mention.
I got a call last night from someone named "Jonah" telling me that I need to be more active on something called "Stuycom." I told Jonah that I have no idea what this "Stuycom" is. Apparently it's this website. And apparently I am a "senior" who runs it.
So here's to reminding you seniors to do your crushlists and be creative. Most of you have creativity. Dan doesn't. Have you seen the Banner of the Week on the right? Yea, he thinks he's funny. He's not. That's not even him.
Speaking of creativity, here are some shoutouts to some creative people. Chri$ Zhao has worked his ass off to get a Toga party going in school, and it wasn't easy (with the "dress code" and all). It's happening on Monday after school at the bar. It's for seniors. Sorry rest-of-Stuy-students, but this is our time. Have fun on your boat asshole Juniors. Additionally, one of my favorite Asians, Jesse Zhang, is PRO at making games and I want to get his website out there. He makes $$$$$$$ off of
this great Flash game. How crazy is that?
Anyway, since Dan and Jonah are the Graphics Advisory Yuppies of Stuycom (GAYS), the pictures that were not made by me are sub-par. I will take over graphics again, like I did way back when Stuycom was a baby in Dan's office's conference room where he got paid actual money to not do work. I'll bring sexy back. It's gone, but I'll bring it back.
Zmonny out. Enjoy the last pre-Memorial Day weekend of your high-school lives seniors (most of you...)
